You know that thing where people on the Left and Right coasts think Iowa is nothing but corn and pigs? Read it and weep:

Iowa Gov. Terry Branstad announced Monday that Iowa now generates more than 31 percent of its energy from the wind.


Note: Not an actual energy producting wind turbine.

That’s right, Silicon Valley. Iowa produces a higher percentage of power from wind than any other state in the Union. Put that in your tofu pipe and smoke it. Do you want to know why wind power generation is so easy in Iowa? Because Chicago isn’t the Windy City. That title goes to Des Moines, Iowa.

I saw you smirk at me, but it’s the truth. I sat in an airport bar in Boston once and asked an airline pilot if Chicago was the worst city to land an airplane in because of the wind. He said no, it was Des Moines. And don’t freak out about drunken airline pilots. He was off duty and wasn’t drinking.

When the Midwest finally got Google last week (wow, you guys will fall for anything), I asked Google for a list of the windiest cities in the U.S.A. According to The Weather Channel, the windiest city in America is Amarillo, Texas at 13.6 mph. According to Google, Chicago’s average wind speed is 10.3 mph. Average wind speed in Des Moines, Iowa: 19.08 mph.

My buddy Jeff said that’s because of hot air from the politicians but I’m not sure I agree. That would make Washington, D.C. the windiest city by a long shot. My buddy Laura pointed out that Iowa isn’t likely to fall into the ocean anytime soon either. I think if it ever happens they can put a giant sail in Des Moines and turn it into a cruise ship.

I was born in Des Moines but raised in Ottumwa, Iowa, and I blame the wind. I remember the day I was born (thanks, Google!) and the highest wind speed measured that day was 21 mph. On the day my parents brought me home from the hospital the wind was from the north. Dad set me down on the ground so he could light his cigarette, a big gust of wind caught my fat head, and we had us a convoy all the way to our new home.

Original article from KCCI Channel 8 in Des Moines: Iowa just became first state in the USA to do this!!